INDIA'S BRICK KILN - c&c are most welcome !!

[Tejal]

Dear All,

I would like to create a story through photographs. The challenge here lies in imagining the desired setting of the photographs before capturing them in separate frames that would tell the story on their behalf. I have selected few from my brick series for that, which are as below.

Kindly share your C&C for my below pics and help in selecting suitable pics. And also guide me where i need to improve in processing of them.

Regards,

Tejal

IMG_9593 as Smart Object-1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

Tejal 1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

IMG_9814 as Smart Object-1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

IMG_1557 as Smart Object-1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

IMG_9665 as Smart Object-1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

IMG_9672 as Smart Object-1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

Tejal 2 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

Mewar_Tejal 1 by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

26069649266_4dbe194932_o (1) by Tejal Imagination, on Flickr

[Shadowman]

HI Tejal,

You have a couple of elements/subjects in this series: you have the labor portion and the smoke portion with a side order of child labor/enjoyment. Consider each of these items and decide which has the most impact and keep in mind the your audience. Regarding processing, every image can be refined, just go over each and see if there are any imperfections that can be corrected or exploited. Have fun!

[ScoutR]

Hi Tejal: Just some quick notes off the top of my head as I scrolled through this series, which I like very much.

I would put the first one last.

I would remove number 2 with the smiling lady because somehow this does not look like a happy situation

number 3 with the children sitting I would put after some of the workers shots. It appears to be the children watching their parents work, so I would put it later so we have more of an idea what they are watching.

The one with the child helping is difficult. Is he actually one of the workers, or was he just posing while pretending to help? When it comes to the story, I am not sure if the children are actually expected to work. Most of the pictures suggest that they do not, so I find this one confuses the story a bit

I would remove the one with the smiling childern. It is a good shot, but again I do not see this as a happy situation, so to me it does not fit. That may not be the story you are telling though. I'm not sure.

The last four shots with the workers, I would put first. They are amazing shots and show incredibly well what kind of work this is and the conditons.

Then I would put the children watching and perhaps the shot with the child helping

The last shot would be the one with the kiln which right now you have first.

Not sure if that helps. You may be trying to tell a different story from what I am seeing. What I see are horrific stifling working conditions and hard labour. Perhaps the subjects are very happy to have these jobs. We are coming from totally different places, so I'm not sure. Maybe that is why the happy faces are OK with you, but for my story they don't work.
I would put last the shot with the kiln chimney and the worker with the raised bricks. It is a very powerful and symbolic shot.

[NorthernFocus]

Hi, Tejal. This is an excellent set of images for a photo essay of the location. IMO the images should be sequenced to tell the story in the manner that you intend to tell it. It looks like you've chosen to tell the story from the outside inward. Personally I would reverse the order for two reasons. First, the last images are the strongest IMO. By putting them first you really capture the viewer/reader's attention right away. Second, by starting with the workers down in the brickworks you follow the flow of work from inside to outside and the stacks of finished bricks. I also agree with a prior comment about removing the image of the three little girls. It is an excellent shot but seems out of place.

I enjoyed seeing these again plus a couple that I don't remember. Great job.

[Dave Humphries]

Hi Tejal,

Your photography generally is good, above average - and so is your processing, therefore, I am going to concentrate on another area to help you improve.

Let me first warn you that I am going to be blunt, hopefully not rude, above all please don't be discouraged by my critique of this thread below.

I would like to create a story through photographs. The challenge here lies in imagining the desired setting of the photographs before capturing them in separate frames that would tell the story on their behalf. I have selected few from my brick series for that, which are as below.

I agree, that is a challenge, but it is not what you have done here because we've seen many of these previously and if I recall, I believe they were shot over many separate visits. You acknowledge you have chosen from a series already captured, which makes the ambition stated above irrelevant, since that's not what happened (as far as I know - please correct me if I am wrong).

Kindly share your C&C for my below pics and help in selecting suitable pics. And also guide me where i need to improve in processing of them.

With regard to advice on processing, I would hope that what you have presented here already incorporates any advice provided when the shots were first shown (individually) here (e.g. I'd be slightly annoyed if I thought we were going over the same ground again).

Given that we have seen many of them before, I think it would have been better if this was stated unambiguously along with a sentence that says whether the versions here include advice previously received.


One other thought is that I find your image naming very 'random', especially in a series, it would be better if they were named with some relevance to the image content, or just a straightforward series of ascending numbers - I think I have mentioned this once before.

I hope those thoughts are helpful to your development as a photographer - it is not enough just to take and process the pictures; you need to be able to engage more effectively with your (eager) viewers. I appreciate English is not your native tongue, but you could 'have a go' at the two ideas I have provided and we'll help if any phrasing issues that arise.


One more thought: Wendy's comments with regard to the working conditions raise the issue of the intended audience (basically 'home' or 'western world') because while those conditions are bad from a western world standpoint, they are (I guess) normal in your country and so the kids may indeed be playing and having fun while their parents work (so perhaps they are valid in the series). Now, getting that across without words seems impossible to me, so this suggests that some form of introduction will be necessary to 'set the scene' and/or state the intended audience.


Perhaps to meet the aims of your introductory paragraph, you should state a subject you intend to cover, outline (or even storyboard) the shots you intend to capture - and then go and shoot, process and present them. Now there's a real challenge!

All the best, Dave

[Geoff F]

These work well, Tejal.

In some ways I think I would like to see the chimney in #1 vertical although the image has impact as it is now.

I'm not keen on the out of focus foreground in #3. I have tried this method with various scenes in the past and ended up ditching all of them. For me, the only successes came when I did a merge of two focus points so the foreground remained sharp.

[ccphoto]

I find images 6 & 7 to be absolutely stunning insights to the working conditions. As to sequencing, I am in agreement with Dave and in addition would like to see you add more at the end where the drama eases up a bit. Perhaps this is where the child mimicking work would fit.

[bnnrcn]

Hi Tejal #5 seems irrelevant to me too, the rest looks very nice as a set. I agree with Dave that you should analyze your subject matter first and decide when,where and what to shoot before shooting your series. A friend of mine likes shooting photos which have stories like yours and his last series was about production of grape molasses. He usually studies his subject first and decides when, where and what to shoot, then he shoots what he has planned already.

[Tejal]

HI Tejal,

You have a couple of elements/subjects in this series: you have the labor portion and the smoke portion with a side order of child labor/enjoyment. Consider each of these items and decide which has the most impact and keep in mind the your audience. Regarding processing, every image can be refined, just go over each and see if there are any imperfections that can be corrected or exploited. Have fun!

Thank you John for your feedback and valuable advise. It will be very useful to me .

[Tejal]

Thank you very much for your feedback.


The one with the child helping is difficult. Is he actually one of the workers, or was he just posing while pretending to help? When it comes to the story, I am not sure if the children are actually expected to work. Most of the pictures suggest that they do not, so I find this one confuses the story a bit ----- The child was actually helping her mother. As all were shifting bricks, she also joined them (i presume that).

I understood from your comments that, you have considered the reverse flow. I have tried to represent outside-in. But as you mentioned, since some of the images are not working well, inside- out flow will be better, i am sure.

thanks a ton for your valuable input.

[Tejal]

Hi, Tejal. This is an excellent set of images for a photo essay of the location. IMO the images should be sequenced to tell the story in the manner that you intend to tell it. It looks like you've chosen to tell the story from the outside inward. Personally I would reverse the order for two reasons. First, the last images are the strongest IMO. By putting them first you really capture the viewer/reader's attention right away. Second, by starting with the workers down in the brickworks you follow the flow of work from inside to outside and the stacks of finished bricks. I also agree with a prior comment about removing the image of the three little girls. It is an excellent shot but seems out of place.

I enjoyed seeing these again plus a couple that I don't remember. Great job.

Thank you Dan for your valuable input.

[Tejal]

Thank you Dave for your feedback.

Let me first warn you that I am going to be blunt, hopefully not rude, above all please don't be discouraged by my critique of this thread below.

--- Not at all. And I will not mind even if you are rude

I agree, that is a challenge, but it is not what you have done here because we've seen many of these previously and if I recall, I believe they were shot over many separate visits. You acknowledge you have chosen from a series already captured, which makes the ambition stated above irrelevant, since that's not what happened (as far as I know - please correct me if I am wrong).

----- All the shots were taken during my single visit. I have been to that place only once. (that too for the 1st time). Previously I have posted single single pics (mostly) that too in random order. Here in this post, I have repeated those pics only (some of them) to showcase the whole activity of brick kiln in one post.

With regard to advice on processing, I would hope that what you have presented here already incorporates any advice provided when the shots were first shown (individually) here (e.g. I'd be slightly annoyed if I thought we were going over the same ground again).

---- i am so sorry, if i have made you upset. Some pics I have posted in color and this time i have posted in B&W. Some were already posted in B&W and on those pics, you have suggested some work on processing part, which I have tried to do. Therefore, I have requested for your feedback or suggestion in processing part.

Given that we have seen many of them before, I think it would have been better if this was stated unambiguously along with a sentence that says whether the versions here include advice previously received.

---- I will keep this in my mind.

One other thought is that I find your image naming very 'random', especially in a series, it would be better if they were named with some relevance to the image content, or just a straightforward series of ascending numbers - I think I have mentioned this once before.

---- yes you have mentioned about renaming of pics. I should have done that.

I hope those thoughts are helpful to your development as a photographer - it is not enough just to take and process the pictures; you need to be able to engage more effectively with your (eager) viewers. I appreciate English is not your native tongue, but you could 'have a go' at the two ideas I have provided and we'll help if any phrasing issues that arise.

---- Sure. Many thanks

Perhaps to meet the aims of your introductory paragraph, you should state a subject you intend to cover, outline (or even storyboard) the shots you intend to capture - and then go and shoot, process and present them. Now there's a real challenge!

--- I will keep this in my mind.

Thanks once again.

[Tejal]

These work well, Tejal.

In some ways I think I would like to see the chimney in #1 vertical although the image has impact as it is now.

I'm not keen on the out of focus foreground in #3. I have tried this method with various scenes in the past and ended up ditching all of them. For me, the only successes came when I did a merge of two focus points so the foreground remained sharp.

Thank you very much for your feedback.

[Tejal]

I find images 6 & 7 to be absolutely stunning insights to the working conditions. As to sequencing, I am in agreement with Dave and in addition would like to see you add more at the end where the drama eases up a bit. Perhaps this is where the child mimicking work would fit.

Thank you very much for your feedback and valuable suggestion.

[Tejal]

Hi Tejal #5 seems irrelevant to me too, the rest looks very nice as a set. I agree with Dave that you should analyze your subject matter first and decide when,where and what to shoot before shooting your series. A friend of mine likes shooting photos which have stories like yours and his last series was about production of grape molasses. He usually studies his subject first and decides when, where and what to shoot, then he shoots what he has planned already.

Thanks Binnur for your feedback and suggestion. Yes, next time I think I will be quite clear about what I want to shoot there. It was my 1st visit and had no idea about the place and the activities there. With great difficulty some how, we got permission to shoot there for some time. Lot of things were going. In a short period of time, it was not that easy to think the story 1st and then to click. But this experience will surely help me to perform good next time.

Thanks once again .

[Dave Humphries]

All the shots were taken during my single visit. I have been to that place only once. (that too for the 1st time). Previously I have posted single single pics (mostly) that too in random order. Here in this post, I have repeated those pics only (some of them) to showcase the whole activity of brick kiln in one post.

I stand corrected

I am so sorry, if i have made you upset. Some pics I have posted in color and this time i have posted in B&W. Some were already posted in B&W and on those pics, you have suggested some work on processing part, which I have tried to do. Therefore, I have requested for your feedback or suggestion in processing part.

Not upset, I just didn't want to think I might be doing something I'd already done before, but it seems that wasn't the case.

We just needed to be told these things 'up front', as you have now, in the sentences above.

Thanks for clearing up MY confusion.

We're all good, Dave

[Manfred M]

Tejal - a very nice series and an excellent capture of how the brick workers live. While it may seem strange to those of us that live in Western countries, seeing children at workplace is a very common site in places in Asia.

I seem to remember seeing some of these shots in colour, and I wonder why you decided to go B&W with this series. I don't have an issue with B&W per se and actually did a lot of work in B&W when I first got into photography. Now I am loathe to throw away all the colour data my camera has captured unless I have a very good compositional goal in doing so. Having seen some of these in colour, I would say you have lost a lot of impact with these monochrome versions.

[Tejal]

I stand corrected




Not upset, I just didn't want to think I might be doing something I'd already done before, but it seems that wasn't the case.

We just needed to be told these things 'up front', as you have now, in the sentences above.

Thanks for clearing up MY confusion.

We're all good, Dave

Thanks Dave for reading my reply. I should have described it while posting the series itself. Sometimes i revise the pic considering all the feedback and try to show you all the revised version in same thread only. But none from this series I have posted again with correction n i am sure I must have mentioned that I will show you the revised version very soon, which I didn't.

[Tejal]

Tejal - a very nice series and an excellent capture of how the brick workers live. While it may seem strange to those of us that live in Western countries, seeing children at workplace is a very common site in places in Asia.

I seem to remember seeing some of these shots in colour, and I wonder why you decided to go B&W with this series. I don't have an issue with B&W per se and actually did a lot of work in B&W when I first got into photography. Now I am loathe to throw away all the colour data my camera has captured unless I have a very good compositional goal in doing so. Having seen some of these in colour, I would say you have lost a lot of impact with these monochrome versions.

Thank you for your valuable feedback.

[purplehaze]

Tejal,

You have the makings of a wonderful series. My only comment, and I can't believe I am disagreeing with Wendy, but I would not edit out images that show people smiling for that reason alone. I would perhaps edit out the one of the three kids smiling because they are engaging with you. A lovely shot, but the few bricks in the foreground are not enough to connect it to the story. As far as the woman goes, I may be wrong, but she seems to be smiling at the man in the foreground, who is oblivious to her, but it makes me wonder about their relationship to each other and adds another dimension to the story of this worksite, which is the working relationships within it. If she is in fact smiling at you, well then I would say it does not belong.